31st March

2day lets just say, half dissapointed half glad, plus some pain. after school YE production was...how should I say...ok we've got very very very little ppl who turned up, I can name all of them. Chen Nyap, Khai Hoe, Jin Yee, Christine, Julian, Adrian, Lily, Su Saint, Felicia, Zean Shiung. See. dissapointment no.1

dissapointment no.2, ppl are still complaining. but glad nol.1, they complain less and do more work 2day. maybe I can consider not to scold ppl that harsh this thursday.

pain no.1, I cut my finger quite deep and was bleeding quite awfully. well, lily was like, showing no mercy when trying to stop my bleeding. Pressing all the blood out so hard. xD. According to her, it's like "the good thing about stopping other ppl's blood is you wont feel the pain so you will not hestitate to press it as hard as you can". xDDDDD

well and then, after production, disapointment no.3. THE PEEPS MENCALARKAN MEJA ORANG LAIN!!!!!!!! how can they not having old newspaper beneath when they are cutting things with blade. I was like, omg common sense oso know you need to cover the table up. Is it that those are not your tables so you can do whatever you want? And after scratching the table they dun even feel guilty and start omg-ing until I discover myself.

and then I put all the things to pn.phang's place, and found out the staffroom locked. try to boro ed-board room (tho I feel guilty for making it like a store for YE, but reli cannot bring home all of them at once la), and oso locked, and finally I have to put in prefects' room la, but feel quite unsafe there, its like there are so many ppl there and who knows ppl might accidently dirty the thing or stepped on it.

Glad no.2, dun tell you. my own secret.

FRUSTRATION. my BM was 84 when the teacher returned to me. I was so freaking happy, and only to discover he forgot to give me 5 more marks. if I got the 5 my purata will be 80.8 this time and win becca who has 80.7. and then you know what? the freaking teacher says that 89 is just too high and he remark my paper. I see him flipping my paper more than 3 times and the 4th or 5th time finally he use his red pen and write something. at the end I got only 86! I mean, if it doesn't affect my class position I dun mind, but after he minus it my purata is 80.5, I lost to becca d! It's like he got nothing to minus d he just simply change my 25/30 karangan to 24/30, and then simply minus my mark from pemahaman without givng me reason. he just put a cross anywhere he wants. I ask him why wrong he say ini salah, kamu ada markah begitu tinggi d jangan cari saya lagi. WTF??? if wrong ok i accept, but tell me why wrong, you cant tell me I wrong because I got high marks, its so unfair!!!! if the answer is accepted then should accept la, you cannot dun accept it bcause my mark was too high, but it doesn't even exceed 100. if exceed 100 u dun give me mark understood la, but this is like....ARRGGGHHHH. so damn unfair woei, my tatabahasa onli got 1 peribahasa mistake minus 2 mark, karangan no error 25/30, rumusan 28/30 and pemahaman got a bit error minus 2 marks, so should be 11. correct la 89/100, but now, he change my mark just because he feel like changing it. how can he be so unreasonable. all the classmates go out and ask him WHY IS THIS WRONG, but they are not ASKING FOR MARKS, he just say ini salah pergi duduk. ini tidak boleh diterima but without telling you why. I mean, learning from your mistake, I DUN EVEN KNOW WHY WRONG HOW CAN I AVOID MAKING THE SAME MISTAKE AGAIN!!?? or is it that you cant come up with a good reason for giving us wrong so u just shut our mouth by force?

and got some freak ar, reli wanna eff him d. I decided to ask for sejarah marks and at the end feel like my answer isn't good enough n din go, he keep asking, got add ma, i feel so frustrated and say 2 marks onli add no add oso same. he says, yalo 2 marks onli ma 84 quite high d la, no nid 2 beg one. I feel like slapping him woei. He got 97 and go ask marks here n there until he got 100, shut ur eff mouth up la. and my BM, he says, aiya 84 oso add till 86 d ma, highest in the class d la still beg for wat. wtf I dun beg just because I want the marks to make my result look nicer, but ITS THE MARK I DESERVE OK???? I DUN ASK MARKS OR BEG FOR IT WHEN I DUN DESERVE THEM. I feel like slapping this guy real hard. HE KEEPS BEGGING FOR MARKS AND NOW HE SAYS aiya 2 marks 3 marks NO NID 2 BEG to ME!!??? tell yourself woei you bastard. seriously kiasu guy. reli tak tahan him d.

losing to becca isn't much a great deal. if my mark is originally losing to her I DUN MIND you know. I mean, you got ur marks deducted for NO REASON and it AFFECTS YOUR CLASS POSITION, WILL YOU FEEL FRUSTRATED!!!???? I tell you I am so gonna get 80 for my BM next time and show him MY BM IS STRONG AND DOES NOT GAIN MARKS THRU BEGGING. if he still says wah 80 tinggi and go minus my marks ar, I reli going to tell the adminstration man. HOW CAN A TEACHER MINUS MARKS JUST BECAUSE HE FEELS LIKE HE WANTED TO DO SO???

random 3 lolx

see so hardworking posting. (cause I just wanna win lily in terms of post, not quality haha)

My 35th post since 16th Feb, and till today is like.....(counting) 45 days and I've got 35 post d. haha. altho got some crappy ones. But I feel like I am so addicted to blogging d. Altho I am busy busy and busying these days, but yet I still try to post. perhaps this is the only place for me to release my stress and feeling I got from the busy hectic life.

I wonder why everyday I view choon lim's blog. well not everyday, at least every time I on9. I was like, keep looking at the YE sales post again and again. I am really jealous on their products. I am jealous of their teamwork. I am jealous of their commitment. I am jealous that I wasn't born a year before. If I was borned on 1991, I WOULDN'T BE THE MD. AHHHHH....lolx

But really, I keep mentioning that YE YE YE, lack of commitment, talk without actions, self-centered, selfish, not giving the best, etc until I am bored of saying those. yee aun was in their meeting last year, and she said that the attendance was so much better, and their commitment. I dont seek perfection, it's not necessary for them to give me ALL their free time for YE. at least do your best until you, like spending 2 hours a day for YE. but from what I see, no offence QC, quality control guy was keep teeling ppl this torn, no quality, this cacat, no quality, and i dunno who just scratch the surface with a big X using blade. but QC IS NOT ALL ABOUT THIS. the feeling u give me is, you are bossing around and try to prove that you are QC. but you know, U R NOT GOING AROUND TO CHECK. u just tell ur friend that sits NEAR you that this no quality that no quality. but the things you gave me, I can say oso no quality. I brought all the not-done boxes to paste, and I am totally shocked to see SO MANY TORN SURFACES. inside! outside I dun mind how ugly it is cause we r going to paste tissue outside, but inside!!! I see torned surfaces!

and yea QC, its ok to eliminate those under quality stuff, but not throwing them or spoil them when THEY CAN BE USED FOR OTHER THINGS. its like, a net surface of 11cm x 14cm x 11 cm stuff, only one small part is torned, but you can cut them or take the middle part that is still nice to make the cover which only occupies VERY SMALL AREA. the thrown away part CAN STILL BE USED. basically my complain is, first, wasting of materials, they are included in our cost ok? 2nd, you are only supervising your friend, I dunno what's this mean, but the feeling you give me is you try to "take control" on your friend by teeling them, "by this time I am the head and you should listen to me, I have the power to 'eliminate' what you do". you are not walking around to supervise the other groups. 3rd, you are strict to others but you dun check the product you make. sry if I mistaken that those boxes I have grudge on is not urs, but according to the size I think they are your group's.

and the QC girl, seems like you are not doing your job. I didn't see you walking around to check, and I didn't really hear your voice. If you did supervise those ppl near you, ok, but again, not to those around you only, QC has to check the WHOLE TEAM. that's all.

ps: I will be very strict from now. Get prepared. scolding will be waiting for you.

random: prefects signature drive coming! I've got one oredi beforehand. haha. 41 signatures left!

random 2

this was done like weeks ago. but lazy to put up, now really dunno y I am doing it when I should be busy. I feel so unfair.......ppl can flirt around during these busy hours and I cant. And here now I try to be a bad boy by flirting around wasting time. Why is human so fair-seeking and vengeful?

I keep telling ppl not to expect fairness in every aspect. nothing is fair. but the peeps seem to unable to take this advice and keep asking me why this why that why should I do this and he dont. Perhaps I am also one of them, just that my sense of responsibility hold me back from applying this "fair-seeking" concept in my duty and societies' tasks. I feel weird, in one sense I think i am responsible, and in one sense I think I am not. teacher teach us "bertanggungjawab"

bertanggungjawab:
1) kesanggupan seseorang diri untuk memikul dan melaksanakan tugas serta kewajipan dengan sempurna.
2) membahagikan masa dengan betul. Seseorang pelajar yang bertanggungjawab akan membahagikan masa untuk kokurikulum dan masa belajar dan bermain dengan sempurna.

somehow I think I fulfill the first requirement but not the second. I mean, I am so not responsible for my homework, I always do last minute work; and not responsible for dividing my time well. I am just not responsible enough to keep myself a good health and work until I am almost dead mentally. Ah well...why am I talking so much. this should be a short one. xD

Doing it for fun

Your Power Color Is Lime Green

At Your Highest: You are adventurous, witty, and a visionary. At Your Lowest: You feel misunderstood, like you don't fit in. In Love: You have a tough exterior, but can be very dedicated. How You're Attractive: Your self-awareness and confidence lights up a room. Your Eternal Question: "What else do I need in my life?"

What's" Your Power Color?

Finally I got some time to relax a bit. or rather...I purposely relax myself. I still got tonnes of homework but reli dun feel like doing them. maybe I will do tomorrow morning at 4am. this is something I saw on Sui Lun's blog. and suka suka just do it. And I got the same colour as him. I wonder of all colours limegreen describes those above. Nvm, since I am just doing it for fun, not taking it seriously. blah.

tired of hell.....

u c, i so long din blog d (altho few days onli, but seems like i've been taking one day as two). thursday YE meeting, quite frustrated, and friday was...what did i do ar? morning count money for the class photo in ed-board room, super relaxing. it feels so good to be ordered around, when you dont have to think, just follow orders.

after school count money for afternoon session photo, but seem that most didn't give us the money so we did very little. then...skipped ungu, cuz counting money. and pn.chan is so nice and she belanja us refreshment. then go to amcorp to pick up stuff. (oh now i reliase, i just blogged 2 days ago) since some ppl din come, onli me lily and yee aun, we bring back the stuff with lots of trouble. carrying the stuff was a pain. yee aun almsot broke her hand, well in terms of mentally. and lily missed 1 hour of her tuition.

saturday YE production day. i still dun understand why the box are all messed up in their sizes. perhaps is that ppl are drawing the outline that i gave them using the sample, so when drawing the sizes are enlarged by 1mm each sides. thats the most reasonable reason i can came up with. in the end we produced...none. yes none. a lot boxes done, but only halfway done. still haven put up the decos. lily should be dying these 2 days...she brought all the already-made boxes home and now she got like 10++ boxes to decorate. and then she's working with the rubber stamp, and then ed-board oso got stuff 2 do, aihz....

i feel really lost. seriously dunno what to do. its like i dunno what's in teacher's mind, and i can't even ask her what to do. i do according to what i know, and then their are something that i nvr imagine or thought of, that teacher can suddenly reveal to me. so the plan again and again is messed up. and i was so shocked to know that xin lin (last year's MD) was so stressed up and she even cried because of the stress. sigh...i think i am no where better. u ask seniors, they tell u according to what they know. but this year situation is different, we r not fully exposed to what YE is and we gotta come up with a sales plan. its like the situation is in chaos now, and yet ppl r complaining on oh-so-little stuff, and backstabbing everywhere. there are a lot members, guys especially, can relax and keep their hands free and talking during the production. and i see the girls seriously are working and working non-stop. and i mentioned bringing me the prototype, hell they dissapoint me again n again. should i give them the last chance? or should i just eliminate the idea suggested? i feel cruel doing that, but the ppl are taking an advantage seeing me just talk without taking any action. i reli reli cannot tahan these ppl. sales is in less around 10 days, and they can still sit back, relax and goyang kaki. and none volunteered to help us to do the box. its like i bring back 20-30 boxes to paste, and lily bring around 10++. and i am not bothered to ask them to do it. if i do ask, they will happily agree, and then when i ask back from them when the deadline comes, they say oh not done.

afternoon prefect duty, i was really mad and no mood to eat. so i duty after eating just ice cream and work. becca and su saint are the boss(es) of the day. so i am jsut being ordered around. yea nice. dun have to think with the brain. and you get to relax ur brain. but su saint's way of ordering really looks boss-like (is this called boss-y? [bossy?]) but ah well, somehow i really dislike it last year but that day i take it like nothing. well and i do appreciate her help by taking 5 boxes home 2 paste.

p/s: for some ppl that u think i do not trust u by not giving u any task to do, ask urself b4 u complain that i pilih kasih. its either, u do not earn my trust, or u LOST MY TRUST. think urself, trust is gained by ur action, not falling from the sky. u cant expect me to trust u when u keep delaying the task given and simply do ur job or by talking without action. moreover, to some ppl, u lost my trust day by day by TALKING BIG all the time. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO TRUST YOU???? HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO GIVE IMPORTANT TASK TO YOU??? i can only give you small task that is not important and does not affect anything whether it is done or not. think about it.

i can trust ppl with no pose, instead of trusting some high poses like manager or directors. because THE ELECTION IS DONE BY FIRST SIGHT and FIRST IMPRESSION. u can talk something very nice and very idealistic, ppl will trust you by thinking "oh this guy thinkgs far and critically" without seeing "this guy talks without doing job" and vote you. when time goes I will know who is talking and mean what they said, or who is just talking but will nvr fulfill his promise. again, TRUST DOES NOT FALL FROM THE SKY, AND TRUST IS NOT GIVEN JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE MY FRIEND. dun take advantage that you are my friend and i can entrust everything to you. DUN TAKE THINGS FOR GRANTED, i tell u i am hell serious and i differentiate personal relationship with my work very well. you can be a friend, but you might not be a good committee. AND I WILL EXPEL YOU JUST LIKE I WILL EXPEL OTHERS IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW THE GUIDELINE SET FOR ALL MEMBERS. hate me if you want, but I wun say sorry for that. u deserve it. know where is ur power limit, dun misuse ur power by taking advantage just because ur friend is what what what director. IF I FIND ANY MISUSE OF POWER, STRAIGHT AWAY EXPEL.

....?

lazy to fill in the title, u do it urself la.

these days were busying with YE. what I can say is dissapointed in some ppl. its like they just complain, complain n complain, without doing things. commitment la, they really dun have commitment la. and then some can really ask me freaking hilarious question like, how are you gonna expect us to raed the notice board everyday, it is impossible! hello??? u have ur recess, reading the notice board is dat tough? or should u say u r not bothered to read? means no commitment la. wat else u expect? spoonfeed u till ur class? n say can i call all YE members out every single wednesday n tell u "we r having meeting 2moro at 1.30pm." for god's sake its impossible. if the notice board isn't used, what is it there for?

and then i said 1.30, they turn up 2.00. even those I MENTIONED TO THEM FACE TO FACE. how dissapointing. and then the thing that pissed me is, i set the dateline, they play a fool with me. delayed it, n on meeting tell me haven done. and they say "as the head u didn't push us enough" DO YOU HAVE THE SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY? IT SHOULD BE DONE LAST WEEK AND UNTIL NOW YOU COULDN'T GIVE ME. hell...and they can blame it on me. fine i will start pushing u like hell. u will regret saying that.

and then these ppl often have this kind of thinking, i am this this this ajk, i do this, i dun do other things. den when another ajk is really busy, they can just like, none of my business. for example, i asked some1 2 go to amcorp to get materials with me 2day. they say, call the purchasing manager to do it la, i mean y u as the managing director should do it urself?

ok, 1st, i am the one that came up with the idea of the prototype, of course i know what materials i need best, even i tell u 1 want this paper that carboard, colour? size? if i can do it why cant i go do it myself, y must we ask other ppl to do it, when ppl is not free? they really have this kind of feeling u know, he is in charge den he do it. wtf? u really want that? for goodness sake, even i ask u to complete ur task u oso cannot finish, if i call u 2 carry out ur OWN RESPONSIBILITY PERFECTLY EVERY SINGLE TIME, CAN YOU DO IT????? it is hell hilarious when this came out FROM A CLOSE FRIEND OF MINE HAVING SUCH A HIGH POSE IN YE. do they know the meaning of teamwork? as human u really dont need help any single time? if you do, ppl will need help too, why cant u help? BESIDES, ITS LAST MINUTE. u cant expect that u tell the purchasing manager i need the materials by saturday on thursday night, and let the purchasing manager to get it done on friday. its ur problem cause u last minute. ppl have things planned on friday how? i seriously no energy to talk 2 these ppl d. I REGRET I DIDN'T TELL PN PHANG THAT THIS GUY CANNOT DO WORK. THIS GUY TALKS WITHOUT HAVING ACTION. but its like, a friend, so shouldn't backstab him in front of teacher. seems like my "generosity" has bring a massive problem for YE.

I seriously hope these guys, yes guys, all complains r from the GUYS, not one, is a lot. I HOPE U THINK BEFORE U TALK, DO YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO COMPLAIN OTHER PPL, DO YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO VOICE UR OPINION ON OTHER PARTICULAR PPL AND TELL THEM WHAT TO DO, WHEN YOU URSELF IS NOT DOING IT AND DOES A POOR JOB?????

and please ppl, think before u promise sumthing, if u cant do it, dun just nod and say okok at the end give ppl nothing, cant do it just say i cant i need more time, not promise everything and dissapoint ppl.

p/s: thanks lily and yee aun for accompanying me to buy the materials, i hope yee aun ur hand is ok after carrying that heavy stuff, and lily sry for making you late for ur tuition for 1 hour. really really sry and thanks a lot. (unlike SOME ppl [promised and din come])

1/100 Master Grade Kit ZGMF-X56S Destiny Gundam - Extreme Blast Mode

After buying it for 1 week, finally I manage to fix them few days ago, now take my time to post here.

The Box!

The guide book.

various poses with different light intensity

oh my i like the wings la, if it can be as colourful as it was shown int he guide book lagi bagus. lolx

note i am too lazy to make it wield the sword and the cannon. nor do I free enough to make the pose of it throwing beam boomerangs. Oh yea....I haven't even colour the pilot. and maybe I will show more picture next time. (maybe after I buy S.Freedom Full Burst Mode and make them fight. lolx)

ani-chan...

ani-chan, new name I came up for u. learn from Jdrama 1. xD. I dunno how to open my mouth with u la. But just feel like......we seem to be strangers to each other now. ni-chan...u look very weird......as if u r hiding sumthing. whenever i look at u i feel like theres a wall blocking in front of u. i reli dun understand wat u feel n wat u think.

kehai ne ani-chan. watashi nani mo wakaru. oshiete, oshiete yo ani-chan. oretachi kyoudai janai ka? naze nani mo, subete mo, jibun dake ga totte ka??? ani-chan!?

i really dont know what to do. what should i do? what can i do? ani-chan? the fact that i couldn't be of any help really annoys me. its really a heartache to sit beside and watch but couldnt' do anything. samete ani-chan. ore wa koko da. omae no soba iru da.

unless......i am thinking of the worst...

Relief Relief Relief Relief Relief!!!!!

relief as in...RELIEF PERIOD. haha.

today we had 4 relief periods man, shiok! BM 2 periods gone, so those oral presenting ppl are freaking happy. and then 2 physics, got rid of hypnotising periods. haha. ok, so basically, first 2 relief period I was half doing maths, half discussing sivik project. and then hmm.......I went to suteng's and becca's place to talk bout the project, and of course....sure talk some crap den go bek to project and crap again 1 la. and then....pn lim yoke keng was just outside, den be gud boy discuss project. i mean, if u walk back to ur place is like...showing that u think u r doing wrong things n u r afraid of teacher oredi. so gotta pretend a bit la, like i am not doing wrong things. lolx. (actually half right in sense that i DID discuss sivik project not just pretending, but half wrong in the sense that i am taking orputunity to talk. xD)

and then physics was fun. played dotty with Darren. at first I was monopolying the whole game, n den just in a while he turned the table against me, and I was like shit shit I am going to lose. But at the end play psycology la, pretending I am defending, and until I need my last dot to win him I show him I am eating his whole territory! wakakakaka. at the end I won la, but close match. haha. fun. and left 15 minutes, so went to kai zhuang's place to learn more about the general knowledge and information, while discussing bout the photo thingy. (same thing as above la, this time is mr lean. lolx. its hard to make urself not to talk other things when the teacher is not around u noe. lol but this time is talk more irrelevent stuff than serious things haha)

n yea, what piss me is...its raining, and I DID BRING MY UMBRELLA, but it's broken....SOBZ. bring d oso equals no bring. I just stuff into my bag. but somehow got ppl see. they were behind me talking. WTF this guy brought umbrella oso dun use, brng 4 wat orh, walking in the rain so yeng meh, haiyo...I was like....sigh....u think i want meh....zadou....

happy monday

today, relatively happy. at least i can get rid of some burden on my shoulder. i'm quite happy and glad to have such good board of directors who are willing to show up even tho it is just an informal meeting. and a lot of things that i couldn't handle alone are all settle. (hey i am good in getting rid of problems eh? but it's like causing problems to other xD nvm, shud be selfish once in a while lolx)

and hm....my chem portfolio is done, moral tugasan harian is done as well. oh shoot....my add maths....nvm shall leave that afterwards. and sigh.....SIVIK.........ah well........

and and I am quite happy with my BC result la, at least I still maintain my above-80 scoring in BC (not to show off, just my last subject that I have faith in, my maths has oredi mencapai markah terendah - below 70 (well tho is add maths) who cares it's still maths ok?) I thought I was going to get like 70+ for BC, but i did get 80 sumthing la, at least, more than 80 by a bit only. lol

and and and becca so unfair la!!!!! pn viji added 2 marks for u, but she didn't add a single mark for me. >.< its like the kinetic theory u got thee mark and I dun get my mark for that. hmph! *perasan looking* ah well, my chem is still higher than u at least... (becca: *perasan looking* ah well, my purata is still higher than u at least... and suteng's gonna : teh teh~~~~[u know what i mean if u always hang out with suteng] and give u a swt look)

ok thats all for today. chaoz

Should Stop This X100

School is starting again in 43 hours. Let's just say, I owe you guys for all the advices and encouragement. Sry for being sooooooooooooo emooooooo. I guess that's the up and down of humans. MD might be a little too stressful, but I guess it's just a matter of time to get used to it. (everyone needs time duh) I should always remember the purpose for me to join YE - learn new stuff. Being MD can learn more than just being a normal member (which I couldn't deny the fact that it's hella more burden)

I hope that I haven't abandon the prefects' duty....(somehow...I got this feeling that I am not doing so well for duty these days) no wonder I was told not to forget about prefects after being MD, before that when I heard this, I was like, will I? In afternoon session I used to hold some small pose, I think I can cope with it. But now it proves that, I am not right (not wrong either), it just that, it will be harder to put ur heart into both at the same time as well as giving ur best into it. (Oh I 4got....but thank goodness Ed-Board hadn't have much activities these days, so it makes me to split myself into three)

Sometimes I really really look up at Lily. She's like, Ed-Board Assistant A&G Editor, Aquatic Club Secretary (I think), Prefect, YE Secretary, CF, English Debate, Biru.....I wonder how much energy she has to excel in every single of them. I mean, for just YE and prefect I pushed myself to the edge, I had even skipped all my Maths training since Jan. Not to say excel in every single of them. On top of that, it's like, she's always so hyper, never seen her walking as if she's dying kind.

ok, so now I should move my lazy bump to my desk and start my chem folio...you know what...I haven't read the questions yet...

dead meat...

really freaking tired..............totally exhausted. these few days really drained my every single bit of energy...

wanna set a plan for YE, but dun even know how to. Imagine you try to set a plan without knowing the exact sales date. worst of all, the teacher dun care bout the sales. she doesn't even bother to know the date...

had the greatest war with my dad. he blame the computer prolem over me, saying that I am the cause for watching anime on9, playing on9 games. I really dun1 2 talk about it anymore. u just ask every1 around u will know almost 90% of teenagers do so, and why is it that only our computer had the problem? Its obvious - our computer is too old, and it only had a freaking 256MB RAM and ppl now are using 1GB or even 2GB. I just ask him to buy a new computer, he thought I want 2 use it for games. He thinks his son is so damn stupid. Buying a comp is for homework use, damn it. imagine all my photos in the computer gone? I didn't save a copy for my personal photos. But lucky I did save the prefects ones. so far the photos gone are YE first meeting, the day we went amcorp and my CNY photos. and all the things i keep inside? Keep the games aside, I lost my downloaded songs, downloaded pictures, documents, contact lists. He thought I am HAPPY for that.

Yea right, he just like to blame things on me. He only see how much I use the computer but not my brothers. He only pick on me. "you dont have to play computer games to survive, other ppl do survive without games" thats what he says. F***, other ppl do have TV ok? he can say he nvr stop me from watching tv, and when he stops me everyday from following the 8TV 7.30 and 8.30 drama series. WTF is this? I serious serious seriously dun have the energy to type all my complains bout him here, I am too tired to type a 2-hours-long post here.

That day I skipped my dinner, and I nvr even SEEN his face since then. I keep myself in my room by just sleeping, whole day whenever he is in the house.

I really lost all my senses, I have all dead lines lining up before me.
18 april - sivik project
12 may - PJK project
April sales, we didn't even decide a theme, the products, not to say mass producing or come up with plan.
and more which I am too scare to think of. Thinking of them more will just break my brain into pieces. I feel like a working machine...without senses or any feeling. Any emotion has to be suppress from day to day and time to time...I want a rest..........

p/s: thanks lily and choon lim, but sry I just couldn't help myself

God Damn It WTF !@#$%6&*

SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK!!!!!!!!!!

WTF! I dun wanna talk about it anymore, YE meeting....uhhhhhh.....sales product planning groupping.....F*** all of them!

Its like watever u plan r all wrong, the teacher is giving u wrong info, and the citi advisors are assuming dat u knew it, and then everything all messed up. WTF!

And even my computer starts to turn the table. Keep restarting once it reaches the log in menu. And now I can only use a laptop. And all photos in the computer, I wonder how am I suppose to get them out. GOD CUT THE CRAP OUT DAMN IT. STOP PLAYING A FOOL WITH ME. U REALLY WISH ME TO DIE WITH A BOMB ON ME AND BOMB UR GOD DAMN HEAVEN!!???

AHHHHH MY ADD MATHS!!!!

well the title show everything. It's AHHHH not YESSSS....sigh....I thought I was able to get somewhere near 80 for add maths you know, who knows....I got only 66.....and seeing the paper really pissed me...ITS ALL CARELESS MISTAKES!!!!! sigh.....I thought I got someone else's paper you know....sigh...

But to my relief my English got 86, it's like, around 10 marks more than my expectation. And my physics is 68, 8 marks mroe than what i've expected. haha (cuz physics is really a subject that I have 0 confident in) but it's like...68....so sayang.....near 70 leh, and made some stupid calculation mistakes too....or else should be near 73....but who cares, I didn't fail my physics! oh yea....haha.

And I am very lucky, to beat somebody....yes that particular body who keeps comparing with me. And always screams why kai wen u got 1 mark higher than me for this subject. (seriously I've got like, 3 papers each having 1 or 2 marks higher than the person) hmm....but who cares, this exam I am only competiting with MYSELF. I am just trying to suit myself with form4, hopefully can get 75 purata. (its not a great demand, after all, its only the first term exam, and many essays questions are yet to be revealed) hopefully can have 75, and next time maybe somewhere near 70, I hope.....(as long as it doesn't drop below 70)

well gotta chaoz....I GOTTA PREPARE FOR FREAKING ENGLISH ORAL PRESENTATION 2MORO...

well it goes like this...
Pn Shanti: 2moro I will start oral presentation
class: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Pn Shanti: I dont care I told you before CNY, as long as I got 5 ppl to present 2moro. If you have not prepare, go find 5 volunteers, as long as there are 5 2moro.
Yao Jie: KAI BOON!!!! kai boon i know you do redi, pls pls!
Darren Choo: Pls Kai Boon....go go....
Kai Boon: (jaw drops)(after a while) teacher do we have bonus mark for volunteering?
Pn Shanti: (ignores kai boon)
Kai Boon: Yao Jie, ask the whole class to pay me 1 buck each then I will happily do it.
Yao Jie: Eh Kai Boon, I suddenly realise you are very handsome today.
Kai Boon: oh really? (perasan a while) thank you, but I still prefer 1 buck each than compliment.
Yao Jie: (swt)
Pn Shanti: ok, no volunteers, I am calling names 2moro, prepared or not, the ppl called are going to do it, or else, marks deducted.

(case closed)

ah u c I crap so much again...lol bye...

Exhausted....

Apparently yesterday night was rushing on my things that are not done which are stated on my to-do list. And I couldn't finish all of them, so just hantam aje, do what that I have to pass up today. Today not much homework (thank goodness) but I am still very exhausted...I wonder why...

Recap my day, the day started with me waking up at 4.30 to finish up my long-delayed karangan. And reached school in a very very sleepy and tired mood. I feel as if I wish to speak as least as possible, like what the Mugen no Kantai in Shakugan no Shana did, (banjo no shite Whilhelmina Carmel's Lord of Guze) speak only 4 words everytime it/she speaks...how good...

Duty was like...half sleeping, but thank goodness I am still concentrate enough to carry them out, at least. And back to class was sort of a relief. Esspecially with my CURRENT results. (not for those later). Oh yea, 4S3 the pity class has switched with 4S5 to use the class beside Block E toilet. Should I pity them or congratulate them? Toilet is just beside so you can go to the toilet in between class without pas keluar with a very small chance of getting caught. But hope you guys can bare with the "perfume smell" (p/s: Just please dont start spreading the smell or even "bottle-ize" it and spray on us)

Apparently after school's badminton was very dissapointing. It took me half an hour to finish a burger, which I don't know why, perhaps no mood? And I just couldn't do things right. Almost every single smash I did was on the net. I wonder...too exhausted? Before the activity ends my hand was in pain. I wonder why too. It never happened to me for playing an 1 and 3 quarter hour game. But today it was just very pain as if the hand was twisted. I remember I didn't block many smashes which will drain more energy. And so, my conclusion is: I am too tired to even play a badminton game.

Reached home at 5.30, take a nap and woke up by a phone call. Pn Phang.....so you know what is it related to. And yea....she got some new idea on our product, which will not be revelaed as the producing of the product is prohibited for the YE program. So just forget about it......

Apparently just after the nap my body is in full ache. But now I still have tonnes of unfinished business to get them done. Wish me luck. Chaoz.

p/s: I posted my 22nd post after including this in a month. Not bad ey?

naze naze naze naze naze DOSHITE!!!!???

Getting to explode. Why is the god so unfair? You didn't give me a new friend good enought to share my problems, but instead you gave me 2 more f***ing damn fools to deal with. As if my life is not miserable enough. Why do I have to face some effing noob to deal with in school who keeps bother me, and even when I am suppose to relax at home in front of computer I have to face another damn freaking noob!!!??? THIS IS THE WORST!!!!

I think I should quit on9, quit messenger. It's like nobody on9 to chat with me, but on9 to bother me. YOU ARE MAKING MY LIFE MISERABLE!!!!! OH PLS, CAN U JUST GIVE ME MORE FREEDOM!!!!!!!????? DONT MAKE ME START HATING EVERY SINGLE HUMAN BEING IN THIS WORLD!!!!!!!! DONT MAKE ME BLOCK YOU FOR GODS SAKE. AND PLS DONT GIVE MY MAIL ADDRESS TO SIMPLY ANYBODY JUST IN CASE I HAVE TO MEET UP WITH MORE F***ING NOOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOD U ARE SO UNFAIR! U MAKE ME IN A STUPID CLASS, AND U CREATE DISTANCE BETWEEN ME AND MY BEST FRIENDS. U R MAKING ME TO LOSE THEM, WE STARTING TO LOSE CONTACT, AND YET U GIVE MORE FREAKING F***ING FREAKS TO DEAL WITH. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS????? AM I SUPPOSE TO THANK YOU FOR THAT???? MY LIFE IS HELL STRESSFUL ENOUGH AND YOU BRINGFORTH MORE STRESS TO ME. IF THIS IS A JOKE PLS CUT IT OUT. DONT MAKE ME JUMP FROM ROOF ONE DAY JUST TO GO AND LOOK FOR YOU FOR REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dunno what am I on9 for now. on9 originally is to release my stress, but it is making me more frustrated. I realise i am getting hot-tempered these days but I couldn't help it. Its like...an alternative way for me to release my stress and anger, but on someone that shouldn't deserved to be treated that way. The only thing I can do is to release them here, but blogging here didn't help me at all, its just another way to suppress the feeling, and one day its most likely going to explode.

I thought giving myself more stress and pressure would make me forget the other things. I tent to volunteer for this for that and make more burden to myself so I can work on those stuff and forget the others, but continuosly doing this really worn me out. I am so tired and I couldn't even think right. This holiday seriously did not had a good rest. ITS ALL ABOUT YE!!!!! calling and calling, and spent 10 bucks just on the day I reload my phone. planning and planning, thinking and thinking. THIS HOLIDAY IS NOT A REST!!!! ITS A PERIOD TO DO MORE WORK!!!!!!!! You see my to-do list few post ago? I have only done half of them and school's reopening in 32 hours time.

damnit. I feel like an old man, I feel like I couldn't cope up with my life anymore. THERE'S NOTHING GOOD TO BE ADMIRED AS THE MANAGING DIRECTOR OR WHAT!!! IF YOU WANT THE POSE JUST TAKE IT!!!!!!!! I RATHER BE A NORMAL MEMBER JUST TO SIT DOWN AND FOLLOW WHAT PPL HAS PLANNED. I HATE DOING PLANNINGS NOW. this post is all about frustration and I even had a gastric till now what I've typed. I feel like breaking things up. I hate ppl that always throw everything to me by adding a word "boss" at the end. It makes me feel like I have the responsibility to do it, WHEN WHAT A BOSS DOES IS SUPPOSE TO ORDER PPL TO DO THINGS.

Have I the right to call pplto chill and not to be miserable and don't be depressed? I DONT EVEN HAVE THE RIGHT TO. How foolish am I when I was leaving comments on other ppl's blog to ask them to chill or so. Yea saying chill is so easy. It's not making the person to feel any better, but rather feel like an insult. It sounded as if they ask you to chill and suppress your feelings and dont show it in front of me, then go home to release your feeling to the wall or anything. Right now just listen to me kind of feeling. If it happens so to you when I dropped a comment, I apoologize for my foolishness. By then I was only trying to show you my support, I hope you dont misunderstand. Maybe it sounded an insult when I did not state things clear.

yea kai boon is back emo-ing, but if that's what you think you're wrong. I AM ALWAYS EMO-ING. just that I didn't show that I am in a depression. Showing it too much, ppl will say "this guy is trying to get attention", don't show it, your friend will say "why keep it to yourself, share it" who can I share with??? I am cut off from any form of connection with everyone I can trust. I always acted so hyper-ish and so funny-ish but I feel I am very fake. I am covering the fact that I am not happy at all when doing those things that you only do when you are in a good mood. I just hate the fact that I have to go all the way to you to tell you I am in a depression if you are my best friend. I thought you should have noticed that I am sort of different than the usual me. Is it too much to ask you to just come foward and ask about how am I doing? Or is it that you are not bothered with what's happening to me? That's the reason, the reason, I share less with you. my joy my tears my depression my crush my current self, I realise I share none of them with you. Are we that close so that we can share the uppest most secret with each other?

As to another friend, another best friend. I wished to help, but I couldn't find the way to. I couldn't help, I feel like I shouldn't bother you for help either, altho you said you are always willing to help me, and it sounded sincere, but I just couldn't ask myself to get help from you anymore. I feel as if I am a bother, I am only seeking help but I don't lend my hands. I tried to reach you, but it always seem hard to reach. I couldn't bare to ask anymre help from you anymore. I don't want to be a leech just to leech out all the energy you have left to help me, when you are so fragile yourself and need the energy to stand up.

where is the me that I used to be??? I am lost. I want to find the me that I used to be. I wanna be happy, I wanna play. Even going out for a friend meeting, its not a meeting that I can actually put everything aside and really enjoy myself. Despite that I seem happy enough, but the day before actually stressed me a lot. We were having a meeting in amcorp for YE. It chills me from inside out. I keep having these "YE ghost" to haunt me everytime I thought I was laughing in full joy. It worns me out just to last for 6 hours and I have to sit down and take a 5 minute nap, which it never happens even I went for a 10 hours outing with a whole gang of friends before. I seriously want to drop this pose. I don't want to be MD, whats the point of getting gerko marks, chance of getting into uni, chance of being petted by the teacher? ITS ALL WORTHLESS. If I can, I would rather be someone else, that has no name in school, someone that teacher will never notice, which nobody recognise, I just feel that the more the teacher looks highly on me and put more hopes on me, it gives me more and more stress. I JUST WANNA SCREAM!!!! What you guys said the day before, "what pose what pose you can get next year" IT CHILLS ME INSIDE OUT. It gives me a sense that I have so much responsibility and so much to do.

Being miserable is part of growing up, but being THIS miserable? I doubt.

todokanu omoi

anata to boku, doko ni iru, sono tooi?

anata dare mo tamodachi wakaranai ka? dakara, boku mou. itsumo ani-san wa boku dai ichiban no tomodachi, dakedo sore wa anata no omoi janai ka? ore no omoi dake?

motto motto, haruka. oretachi no eien no yakusoku doko ni iru? subete wa ima wakaru, ato...wakaranai? sore ima kimeru dekinai. ore itsumo hitori ikiru dake. dare mo shinjite dekinai de arimasu. sore wa ore no sekai, ore no unmei, sore dake watashi wakaru.

YE group discussion...? (more like playing for fun)

Ok the meeting will be on at 10, but in case of ppl getting late, we decided to tell them to meet at 9.30 (ppl are usually not punctual) and you know what, I reached amcorp at 9.15. lol ok....because when I was waiting outside the bus-stop my uncle who is going to work saw me there, and give me a free ride, (saved 1 buck lol) and reach extremely early. (save time waiting for "rapid" kl ma)

so I walked around, and no shop was opened (ok maybe some, those doing kafeteria business for ppl having breakfast ones), and then it was like 9.25 after I walked around and found it super boring. smsed julian, and thank god he's coming at 9.30, or I will be there so lonely till 10 =p adn apparently he reached at 9.40, and khai hoe with him (I thought he says hes not going 2 fetch khai hoe one ar)

<千の夜をこえて>
u ok lily ok i ok
Jules
yea
<千の夜をこえて>
u ok den go fetch that snoopy here
Jules
where's he?
<千の夜をこえて>
....
i mean if snoopy has no transport
u fetch him la
Jules
hey, as if my mom's a driver here
<千の夜をこえて>
ur mom always provide package service to him wat
Jules
no
<千の夜をこえて>
dats ur problem with him la i dun care la lol
Jules
it took loads of persuasion
<千の夜をこえて>
or just ask him take bus

c tipu ppl one, say dun bring him only at the end still bring d. (note snoopy is khai hoe)

and then they somehow din realise i was behind them...ah well...i am too tired to yell at them, so smsed julian "idiot behind" but somehow he still didn't look back. and i wonder they are walking so fast and i thought i am a fast-walker but i couldn't catch them up, and until i tailed them till the evaluator khai hoe realise I was behind. no wonder they are walking so fast ----- julian's in a hurry to pee! lol

then we went for breakfast, apparently I woke up and went out without having breakfast. and then lily smsed and say she might be late, and soon chris oso sms saying that she will be late. (c we so gentlemen waiting for the girls and the girls are those who are not punctual lol lily dun chop me ar) and then lily appeared 20 minutes later altho she said she will be late only 10 minutes later? (ahha dun stranggle me lolx) and soon chris arrived, and then we discussed bout the stuff what product should we make.

then walk around to get our materials, and then at 11 yee aun finally replied our call "I cannot come no transport" chris was like, uhhh now only you reply us. lol and then chris has to go for tuition, so sent her off, and returned to popular to get our stuff. apparently, lily and julian were crazed over fictions and keep stopping to look at the books. so me and khai hoe were waiting, doing nothing. and when we saw jul and lily were standing side by side, (hehe here reveals what was I doing just now lily), the evil Kai Boon decided to be a stalker, I took out my phone and tried to snap their photo of a *couple* but failed. haha...this is the best I could get.

And then we went to taman jaya to work on our stuff, and see everyone's so hardworking ar.

oh wheres chris? tuition lo. oso hardworking. haha

and after that me and lily went to fetch chris from her tuition *house* at around 1.05, since her tuition should end at 1.00, and I thought I expect her to nag nag nag and say why so late. But you know what? It turned out that me and lily were waiting her till 1.25. lol....and of course, we teased her, and ask her to belanja lunch. and yea, we returned to taman jaya, and the three of us did *something* highlight to see.

before that

chris : where are the other two *gentlemen*
boon : taman jaya

chris : for what

boon : g*y dating

eventually we burst out laughing. and then we decided to stalk them, see what are they doing, we keep laughing on the way. and then lily added : that explains why they keep shooing us (lily and kai boon) to pick you (christine) up. so they can have their sweet time. and then we came out with a lot of stupid questions, like "will they kiss?" "are they holding hands?" "shall we go and interrupt?" "shall we peep?" etc. haha (the both of them are so gonna kill me man...but the chance of them reading my blog is like...uh....0.01%. yea so I should be safe. Those who read ar, dun tell them ar, or the next thing you see is me being skinned alive)

dating!!! ahhhh!!!! <<<(highlight)

and soon we took a photo we returned to them, (lol) and then go to eat in mcdonald and keep asking christine to belanja (of course she didn't) and we took a lot of funny (and stupid) pictures.



Khai Hoe eating fries

Look at their funny faces eating

lily and khai hoe once were eating strawberries together, today they were eating fries together...

is julian jealous??? (jkjk dun come after me with a parang)

Why are you looking at me (to julian)

and why are you looking at me (to khai hoe)

lily's sword fighting with christine's uhh.....whip? lol

Christine eating her all-wrinkle fries

oops christine having problem giving birth to baby!!?? push....push christine...yes i can see the leg...keep pushing...push!!!! (lolx)

All-standing fries

they were commenting how big is khai hoe's face and drinking small cup of coke, and how small is my face but drinking so big cup of coke...

Christine : Khai hoe I just realise how funny when you laugh
Khai Hoe : haha, yea thats right, now only you realise ar
(this photo was snapped when khai hoe was "haha"ing

Seems like khai hoe's having problem eating fries... and julian seem like having a cigarette

They refuse to get their photo taken anymore...

haiya, why so much fries one ar? (or are they "haiya, why kaiboon keep snapping photo one ar"???)

haha funny right? ok and then we went to toilet. and while waiting for the girls...they posed....like a prisoner...


then we were searching for a place to complete our prototype. and at the end....it was drizzling. so we decided to do it at starbucks. and julian and chris ordered drinks, and we, the others, happily do our work with them crying over their bills. haha. (ok lily did share with chris for the drink, but me and khai hoe cant be bothered about julian since he is so rich and din even complain, evil right us? lolx)

and after some working, finally, time to go home! and then....of course, need this....

additional note : how come when I added images all the spaces where I have pressed "enter" seem to have another line of spacing? I have to keep backtracking and delete the extra "enters" and this pose took me 1 hour ++ to get done. !@#$%^&

still on SPM result

well yesterday lazy to complete the entry, so today continue with it with more detail for the duty.

We were belanja-ed breakfast by MrLean. and due to traffic jam the teacher was late for half hour, and we were mumbling y teacher so late 1 ar. and actually we should start duty at 9, at the end we start eating at 9 and duty from 9.30. lol eat nasi lemak lo, and then duty. Really see a lot of lalas, all sorts of hair style and fashion cloths. and coloured hair, and guys with really long hairs...lol it was actually funny to see them, esspecially a girl, maroon hair, with 2 long pink coloured "tail" like on her hair. very obvious those kind of pink, its like the pink colour from ur buncho poster colour kind of pink.

yea and the peeps were really funny, no la natural colour, wah our school used to have a lot angmo with blonde hair eh. lol and they tried every way they could to borrow caps, some guy dun wanna borrow them, even their hair is not dyed. why? THEY JUST CAME BACK FROM NS!!! lol, their hair is used-to-be-james'-style, botak, haha, and including andrew. yes andrew siau, but he didn't wear cap la, so pn lim yk see him wah, model hair style, stand here and show every1. lol.

and yea, when wen zhen came in, she was hi-ing with all the form5s, form3 she dun really know la, but somehow she din see me. lol......when she is about to go, only she see, ei kai boon hi, wah....lol....seems like my existance beside people is really weak, cannot see i am there kind. hmph! next time dont take ur photo d. lol (wait, i stop taking her photo after she retire, and its not like shes coming back to school just to get her photo taken, haha)

anyway, and jie hui changed a lot, jyh ling was sitting in the teacher's car and came in so megah (cause' students' car are not allowed to enter the school, so those came with car oso have to stop outside) and and....a lot seniors oso but they were like a whole gang standing at the entrance talking to teacher, and everyone thought they cannot go in because so many ppl were outside "being blocked" (is they volunteer to stay outside one okay? they want to talk to teacher so they stay outside as if they were not allowed to enter the school)

anyway, altho feel kinda....zadou to go for the duty, but overall still okay la, and seeing those ppl are another form of entertaintment. lol. and i think we are going to be given merit marks O_O but before we went we dunno one lo, haha. see we so good, go duty even tho we dunno got merit marks, so of cuz should be given more marks ma. haha.

ok thats all for this one. chaoz

My blood* wenesday

......

shin yee called me few days b4, asking me if I can help out during SPM result day. I thought we are going to need around 30 peeps, well its tough to find 30 peeps during holiday, yea so I agreed. YES you read it right! I *AGREED*

and today i went for duty....guess what? they only need 10 ppl, wat the hell? den I shouldn't have agree in the first place =.= T_T. I postponed my date with my beloved.......MY PRECIOUS COMPUTER!!!! yea. at first I should have start playing my computer in the midnight, since I don't have to get up early, at the end I didn't play in the midnight, and also, I didn't play in the morning cause' I was having duty.

And you know, the 10 ppl there, again I AM THE ONLY GUY!!!!!!!!! screams!!!!!!!!! why am I always stucked with girls??? I mean, I am also the only *male* prefect in my class, and now having some kind of duty with all girls again??? Is it that guys are too lazy...? I wonder....lolx....*wait a minute, that makes me a girl!!?? no no, should say that I am the only hardworking guy* (perasaning)

And that's not all, among the 10 ppl, I AM THE ONLY FORM 4!!!!!! ok....2 form3 girls, talking with each other, 7 form5 girls, separated into groups, talking with each other 2. and I am the only one standing and doing things so seriously, yes because I have no one to crap with, or I will end up talking and not doing a thing. lolx. that makes me the only *hardworking guy* and the only *hardworking form4* (perasaning again) well...because shin yee did not call other ppl......(that means I got bullied by her xD)

I stood there for 3 hours I think, and then without knowing the results I went home. xD I don't wanna spend anymore time standing squeezin in the hall with a bunch of la-las. serious, almost half of them dyed their hair, slippers, wearing sleeveless shirt, and they figured all the ways they can so they can get into the hall, either with caps, borrow shoes and jackets, all sorts of ways. tough man. seeing them really, makes me feel like how time can change a person.

Off duty at 12.30, and reached home by 1.30, that's because I was lucky that I do not have to wait 30 minutes for a bus, I just waited like 10-15 minutes from the school and less than 5 from midvalley. and you know what, I slept in the bus, when I woke up....I was just 50 meters away from the nearest bus-stop from my house. *too bad, u didn't get to see me got freaked out because I missed the stop that I should get down*

anyway, and after lunch, straight away practise my guitar, I haven't go for my class for 7 blood* weeks. yes 7. heres the list

23 Jan - Thaipusam, centre off
30 Jan - Ungu switched to wed, so I gotta miss the class
6 Feb - CNY eve, centre off
13 Feb - centre still in CNY mood and not feeling to be reopened
20 Feb - stupid EST class suddenly switched to wed, so gotta miss again
27 Feb - still EST class, but finally I made up my mind to drop it after it.
5 Mar - school exam for god's sake, I am not going for the practise, I want study!!!!!!!!

and yea, actually today suppose to go 1u one la, but last week I called the centre that everything returned normal cause' I've talked with my teacher and I settled my EST thing. so starting next week (which is today) I can continue my class. and heck....the peeps inform me after I called the centre, it's like, I keep calling the centre and skipped the class oredi, so I can't just call back and say, aiya sry I got activity going on on the coming wednesday right? the peeps going all available on wed only somehow, whatever, the result is still the same--I missed 1u, AGAIN!!! for 2nd time!!! zzz.....to tell you what....next week YE meeting going on on Wed......because holiday on thursday....so......I AM GOING TO SKIP YE!!!! I can't afford to pay the whole month's fee (which is 80 bucks for 4 lessons) for only 2 lessons!!!!

Woot Great War of General Election!!!

First of all, oh yea! Say bye bye to BN! First Penang Kelantan, then Kedah Selangor Perak. Penang best show man! And even 2/3 majority in parlimen oso bye bye d.

wah syok loh this time, looks like BN giving sweets trying to cheat the kids doesn't work anymore, in fact they even gave ppl RM200 to go home and vote for parti pembangkang! hah! funny man. BN say very sweet eh, i promis this i promise that, who cares? SJK got how many? u SK got how many? u SK one class 20 ppl, one school so big, some even got empty class, we SJK leh? no money find sendiri, bina school bina sendiri, one class 50++ ppl, teacher oso not enuf, apa u buat? apa lu cakap adil untuk semua kaum, banyak adilnya!

jangan bagi gula-gula la, kami tak mahu. apa polis mu buat? ada orang boleh merompak di luar sekolah la salle, dan apa sudah kamu buat? semua merompak di sini di sana, polis mu duduk minum kopi, tengok banyak sudah *big size* d. muka pun big, tangan pun big, perut pun big, semua kopi, mana kopi datang? lu hulurkan tangan terima duit kopi dari orang, itu badan pencegah rasuah ar, tulis di buku teks moral tulis sampai begitu baik orh, entah tak entah kamu pun terima duit kopi. ataupun kamu semua tidur, orang rasuah pun tak tahu. aduhai, kesiannya BN.

next time don't just do dis do dat only before election la, before that wat u do? bina this bina dat useless and pointless things, just to let ur country look very megah, but inside leh? rasuah rasuah, kes jenayah banyak, how you solve cases? everyday say i will investigate and i will definitely bring justice to you, and the end u say i investigate, investigate, but do nothing, wait till 1 year 2 year ppl 4get den u apa pun tak payah buat.

now u noe la, u boleh tipu kampung ppl nia, all big big city perak selangor penang kedah all u mati d. ur 2/3 majority oso bye bye d. c u continue "i promise i promise, and say (i promise i wun do) silently behind", n c next time u got 1/2 voting for you 2 continue 2 rule or not. promise more la, no action la, ppl oso noe 2 say u NATO - No action, Talk only. Parti pembangkang, dun be like BN promise promise ar, beta show result ar, or else next time u c quah min chern go be calon bebas den lagi cham lo. xD

random-ish

my holiday...boring...haix......how should I put it into words...

I know it is very ironic, when I say I will be busy in the holidays with all the to-do list in the few entries back. But yet...its like...no entertaintment. Computer gotta share with 2 other brothers, and I finished my anime shakugan no shana d, even the part two on youtube oso watch till episode 20, and waiting for the next episode to be released.

I am so freaking bored...on9 I oso dunno what to do. I am bored with games, esspecially when you gotta face some annoying ppl in game. its true, some ppl are really annoying. you dun talk to ppl they will come crap with u, ask u this n that. beg money most common, or else will keep asking you to help this help dat, or some will just lanc n chuan u. play games that don't need social things la, u will be bored in no time.

on9 dunno find who to chat, its like ppl u want to chat with are living in different world with you now, I don't know who can I talk with now. on9 surfing net...dunno what to surf what to find. life is plain boring.

p/s: if u call me to go for an outing since it is an holiday, I don't know who to find, ppl are *all occupied* on *days I am not occupied*, and they are *not occupied* when *I am occupied*.

i feel like the ppl i know are all just thinking bout themselves, (not all, at least, but most) and wouldn't even bother to care what's happening around them. they will push things they don't like to do to you as if you like it a lot, they will say i dont like to do this so i dont do and you do it, as if it is the most normal thing to do in the world. what a friend...they will think you are free but in fact you are not and you dislike doing things like dat just dat nobody is willing to do it and at the end i have to do it (though I don't know why I am so willingly to take the responsibility), but hell no this time, if it's so they treat a friend as a tool or a machine to do things they dislike, then I wouldn't hestitate to kick them out of my friend list.

And some random thoughts, how come people around me just don't know how to care about ppl's feeling and they cannot judge what's ppl thinking from what ppl are doing? When you are annoyed and talk to them in a very frustrated tone, they will not bother about it and continue to piss you, or is it that their eq is that low enough and couldn't understand simple human feelings?
You tak suka ppl do this to you den dun do this to others, its natural. If you don't want people to tell you directly you are freaking annoying and just leave me alone, pls be more observant on ppl's reaction towards you. don't say that i am cruel for saying such things to you when I have to, because there's a limit in tolerance.

Oh yea...now I realise exam is over

Hmm feel so free tonight, why leh, now only I realise exam is over. lolx. Just now was busying with the YE stuff which I don't know what and how to deal with, now got an idea of how should I do d, heh, calmer now.

Hereby I announce, FORM 4 FIRST TERM EXAM IS OVER!!!! (lame~~~~)

Oh yea...now I can do what I want, CAN ONLINE LIKE MAD!!!!!! =D

Guys and Gals, Boys and Girls, Sissys and Tomboys, Human or Animals, ENJOY YOUR HOLIDAY!!!! xD

Oh yea, now I realise, I AM GOOD IN BLOGGING!!!

I just started this blog for one month, and I got 14 posts now (hey I am good). *Gives you a perasanish chuan look*

Planning for holidays

Ok, since I got things full on my hands, gotta prepare a list on what to do.

1. Finish all my unfinished homework before the exam which I keep delaying (since they don't need to be handed in)
- Chemistry (paste the notes)
- Biology (paste the notes)
- Moral (paste the notes)
- BM Karangan (this is delayed for dunno-how-long)
- Add Maths
- Biology exercise (I haven even get the exercise book)

And plus new homeworks
- Chinese keratan akhbar
- Moral Tugasan Harian (2 essays)
- Chemistry portfolio (!!!!!!!!!!!)

And then things to handle for YE:
- Call the peeps to get the prototype done
- Call christine if we need the meeting of BoD
- Find my group
- Find an idea and get my prototype done
- Next meeting's preparation

Being the managing director really stressed la. Tuesday morning I still ok one when I look at the mirror, now look at the mirror, full of pimples d, instant effect man. lolx

The First-Messy-Meeting of YE

Well...judge from the title, you know that it is the first messy meeting, note that it is not the first meeting that is messy (which means we have other meetings as well but only this is messy), but it is messy because it is the first time we are having meeting.

Apparently Pn Phang has something to do and cannot be there...and Pn Tan is new to YE, and yea......so I gotta make some decisions......cause our advisors really acted as just advisor and not to help in making decision kind.

We started with the "Voting-for-Empty-Board-of-Directors" and then first I gotta explain what does all the poses mean and what they do...*screams* I didn't memorise all of them la, I just briefly read through the booklet yesterday and at the end I still have to refer to the booklet to give explanations =.=''' and then the voting eat a lot of time........

3 o clock, only we start with the name-deciding, and that takes another 20 minutes...10 minutes to dismiss time d woi. lolx. oh yea btw, the name is called "C-Nergy". and then this comes the headache part...I brief the peeps about the shares, ok this no problem, and ask if they could come back during school holiday (this is messy, some ok some not), but at the end still cancel the meeting during holiday. Tried to ask the BOD (board of directors) to stay back, but at the end all gone...and then I tell them about the sales, and here comes the worst. Everyone bombasted me with details and what to do...I am just as confuse as they are! Pn Phang just ask me to tell them and she didn't really tell me the details (And I am just elected 2 days ago okay...I don't really know much about what-to-do)

Screams! and then that's how things after the meeting goes:
1. told the peeps to get ready a proposal to be presented after holiday, in groups of 6-7, and then we will call you and tell you what is the theme so you can work on it
2. at the end, according to senior's suggestion, we are just getting ideas, so just make it 2-3 peeps a group to prepare proposal and we get the best ones out.
3. Pn Phang call me after I reached home, she say she wants the prototype, not the proposal.
4. okay crap...seems that I need to call all the peeps again and tell them that we are going to........DO THE PROTOTYPE!!!!! no holidays!!!!!

Thought of The Day

Oh well...how shall I begin with...

Let's start with...OH YEA, 2moro is the last day of exam!!!!!!! (lols) But with Moral and Physics, definitely not an easy day for the final day of *death week*

Anyway, I was called to meet with Pn Phang yesterday, and then she asked me about some people personalities and attitudes etc. And then I was about to keep everything private la, and pretend nothing happen like dat lo.

and today she made an announcement, to meet me, Christine, Lily and Sharon after school. Ok lo. And then Lily asked me what happened, so tell her what's going on, yea...and then others are guessing that four of us got our pose in Young Enterprise redi, and then Lily just tell them she knew her pose as well, then people are so smart, and they got everything correct d. At first I was quite shocked when people start congratulating me. But they just know la, from these small things wo, CHS prefects are always observant xD

Yala I was elected as the Managing Director la, but suddenly feel quite burdened. So this is the feeling of being a team leader. xD not even started anything you feel stressed d. I was initially happy, and plus a bit of worry, most of all feel like nervous. In fact YE is not a club or society that is similiar to any of the clubs in the school. I had totally no experience in this. At first was thinking getting a small pose is enough, or just get a pose that do not need to much of social communication skills. But at the end...Managing Director needs good social communication skills in order to lead the group and act as the bridge between the mentors and the members, wah feel stressed d (but not just from now on, it's from the moment I knew that becoming the Managing Director has been a fact in reality) but it is good la to be recognised by the teacher. Must be prepared and have to start learning from seniors d.

After school meet with teacher to get the booklets, and almost late for my transport, of course got nagged by the driver. xD.

Untitled

Sigh...hate school...hate life...No mood for anything...ok....that sounds emo-ish, but who cares, I am emo-ish now.

Have to go to school in 1 hour+ time, and exam's starting 3 hours after this. Today basically is relax la, 2moro Sejarah...and last day will be the worst, Moral (freaking useless things to memorise) and Physics (which I only will understand 3 sentences out of a hundred in a Physics lesson)

If really study now can make it one la, but just...no study mood...ahhhh....but feel like writing a poem. xD. Read if you want, but I think you will regret for reading, cuz it's lame and on top of all - emo-ish

Shadows left,
But you're gone.
Memories remained,
but hopes vanished.
Disappearing one by one,
when time flies through,
left behind,
are vestiges of scar.

Guides and supports,
unheard and unseen,
what leftover,
is an idiot turning a freak.

mienai no kimi,
zenbu wa hitotsu hitotsu, kieteru
kage dake, ore mieru
ore no sobe iru,
dare mo nai,
sore wa genjitsu,
kono mama hashite dake dekiru.
kirai...

Dying for Bio

Just briefly studied my Bio...briefly, finished at 5am, not bad. But if asked about details, I will die...

Really no mood to study last night. Tried to sleep early but my cousins just came before I sleep so gotta hang around longer. Last night was...awful...can't even concentrate. Perhaps it's my fault to put so much photos on my table and hang them on the wall...I just keep looking at photos but not my textbook. And the photos bring me bitter thoughts. How pathetic I am.

As you can see (or maybe not), my post these few days are so emo-ish. Yes I just can't live properly right now. Feel like talking to someone but everyone should be busy studying so I don't really feel like making phone call to interrupt. 2 months redi lo, but yet I still can't find myself living as a member of 4s1. sigh...

Couldn't cope with studies, don't feel like asking those people around me. Keep bugging people doesn't sound right. Especially when Jing Dao the brain is always busy helping people to solve problem...Don't feel like taking more of his time to answer my silly questions. Miss last year, when another brain (or walking encyclopaedia) Julian is just beside me. And right beside me got Christine who can let me tease and play around. And behind got Chen Nyap and Jun Yang constantly joking. It's real joke, not cold joke.

No time for long post, altho I am only 10% of what I am feeling right now, gotta prepare for school, and I forgot about studying BC...